Citizens! Congratulations, you have been selected for an interesting & fun mission! Do you want to help your bot friends? Of course you do! Fun will be had; The Computer said so!
Citizens! Congratulations on completing your recent mission! Report for debriefing and potential assignment to vacation duty. Fun will be had; The Computer said so!
Every 5.47101 yearcycles, citizens from across Alpha Complex gather to compete for honor, respect, and bonus food rations! Can you survive? Remember, the odds are never in your favor!
Congratulations, citizen! You have been randomly selected to join the final quality test of HPD&MC's latest HappyFunActivity! In Actual Alpha, you'll live the life of a Troubleshooter in a reproduction of Alpha Complex. Experience the excitement of chasing down Traitors and defending valuable equipment! A fun time will be had; Friend Computer said so!
Welcome to Paranoia XP, 300% better than any previous version and 1,025,894% better than those other "not-fun" RPGs! Assigned to [DELETED FOR SECURITY REASONS], the Troubleshooters will have to [DELETED FOR SECURITY REASONS] or all of Alpha Complex will be [DELETED FOR SECURITY REASONS]!